Like a Magnet

The future draws me toward it like a magnet draws iron. Tuesday, I will start the winter season -- one of isolation. To many, this time is to be kept at a distance. Avoided, if possible. It attracts me and creates a strange anticipation. It is coming, no doubt, like tomorrow's weather. I see anvil-shaped clouds in the distance and I can't help but wonder what they will bring.

I have weathered storms like this before -- hernia surgery as a teenager and gall bladder removal in my forties. The pain is familiar and I know that it will pass. The unknown factor will be the ileostomy (look that one up). I feel no fear, but uncertainty about what it will be like to have my body altered in such a way.

No matter what the future brings, it will be different from today. And that is what pulls me into it. I am curious about what I will feel and how I will adapt. I do not anticipate dread and sorrow. In fact, I am not aniticipating anything at all. It will be what it will be.

Today is beautiful. I feel great. There are storm clouds on the horizon and they are full of awesome, healing power. I wonder what kind of tempest they will bring. I am waiting...